Hi Family!!Things in Taoyuan are good! I love my companion Sister Messenger. She's a lot of fun and has a cute little laugh. She comes from a very interesting background and I really respect her a lot. This is her first time being Senior companion, so we're figuring things out together. She's awesome. I wonder how I've been so lucky with companions...sometimes I worry...my day is coming in which I will get the crazy companion. Haha. Maybe I'M the crazy companion!! Haha. Anyway, Sister Messenger is from Washington and is also 23. She's alot of fun. When I moved, my bike came a day late, so we got around Taoyuan with me sitting on the metal thing on the back of her bike. It was so funny!! It bruised my bum like crazy and Sister Messenger had to pedal a heavy 120 lbs+ load but it was sooooo fun!! We got a big kick out of it. I'm sure the Taiwanese did too. I could only get on the bike by making a running jump onto it while it was moving. So when we came to an intersection, the people waiting for the red light saw 2 foreigner missionaries --1 of them pedaling like crazy with another one running after her, making a leaping jump onto her bike. It was so funny. She got a flat tire later in the week...too much stress on the tire I'm sure.
It's been raining like CRAZY!! I HATE rain! Actually, I like it, but I just hate being a missionary in the rain. Wearing a skirt and biking in a total downpour is pure misery. And I have a lot of pride so I hate wearing the "yoo-ees" they have here and it's too hot to wear my raincoat. Yoo ees are big rain ponchos. I HATE them. They always ride up so your skirt gets soaked anyway and they are hot so you sweat and get just as wet on the inside. But everyone is telling me the acid rain is going to make my hair fall out and give me skin rashes if I don't start wearing them. Ugh. There are some better yoo ees that are more like windbreakers with pants that I can stuff my skirt into, but I don't have the money. The yoo ee I have smells like fish. Haha. I need to wash it. I came to church wearing pants because I would rather ride an hour in soaking pants then change into a dry skirt for sacrament than sit in sacrament in a sopping wet skirt. Some member women were mortified to see a Sister Missionary in pants when I walked in. Hahahaha.
So we've had some really good times in Yaoyuan, but it's been a little hard too. I've heard it's hard for a lot of missionaries to leave their first area. You just finally get over culture shock and love your first area, then you're quickly booted out. Whenever I feel out of my element, my old enemy perfectionism comes back with full force. Then I learn to overcome and it's all good. There is a trend, it seems, that every transfer when a new missionary comes in, current investigators in that area "die" or stop meeting with you. So right now we don't have a whole ton of people to teach. On top of that, the Elders are supposed to give women to the Sisters to teach and we give them men, but I guess in this area the Elders don't like to do that. So we don't get many female referrals. I've been praying a lot for us to find people to teach. We've been contacting at every light and I've been going crazy wondering WHAT I'm doing so wrong that makes it so hard to find people. I was having a REALLY hard couple days just not knowing what it takes to bring people unto Christ. But I think Heavenly Father isn't such a harsh being as to let us go crazy without helping us. For example, after those hard couple days, I had a cool experience at a stop light. All I said was "Hello, I'm Sister Dowdle. I have a message about the gospel of Jesus Christ" then the kid on the scooter said "Mormon??" I said, "yeah!" then he pulled over and gave me his name and number and said he'd come to church. I called him the next day and he said "yes yes!! I really want to meet! When?" I said that night and he said yes, he was even willing to drive an hour. He actually ended up having his grandparents come in town unexpectedly so he had to change times. But then I asked him if he knew anything about our church and he said, "oh yes! I just went to Mormon.org, the website on the pamphlet!" This guy is really awesome and genuine. It's a miracle! It's cool because my contacting approach kind of stunk but when someone is prepared to receive the gospel, it doesn't really matter what you say.
Like I said, this past week has been really hard. I just feel like a bad missionary sometimes. Then I wonder if I'm good enough to be out here and wonder what Heavenly Father feels about my work and me. Does He really love me? Even when I make mistakes, like lose an opportunity to talk to someone, don't go to bed exactly on time, get mad at jerky people, fall asleep in sacrament, etc. I was just feeling unworthy and frustrated this morning and prayed before personal study that I would study something that would help me and someone else. I decided that I'd read Moses that day, since I've actually never read the Pearl of Great Price. I really LOVE it! I really feel like it was an answer to my prayer. I read Chapter 1 of Moses. In Moses 1, God is talking with Moses face to face. Over and over, he tells Moses who Moses is. It's so beautiful and loving. God calls him "His son" (vs 4, 6, 7) and says that Moses is "in the similitude of mine Only Begotten" (v 6) or in other words, he is created after the image of a Perfect, Glorified, Wonderful Being. So in this rare opportunity Moses has to talk to God, God just tells him his infinite worth --a Son of God who was created in the same mold as a God. Then in verse 9 God leaves Moses and he (Moses) has no strength because he is "left unto himself" --a weak being who is the heir of and child of a God but inherited weaknesses of the flesh. Then he realizes that he himself had to be changed to a more glorified state to be able to behold the presence of God. Then! Satan comes. And the FIRST thing he says is: "Moses, thou Son of Man." So God just built Moses up, saying, "hey! You're the actual Son of a God and you're in the image of Jesus!" then Satan comes and says, "hey, you weak son of man." Then Moses is awesome and says "Who are YOU? I'M a Son of GOD, in the similitude of the Only Begotten." Then Moses tells Satan, "wait a second, God was SO full of glory, I had to be literally CHANGED to not wither and die in his presence. But I can talk to you like you were any old schmoe. Where is YOUR glory?" Then in verse 15 he says "I'm not as full of glory as God, BUT I have enough of the Spirit with me to know that you have NO glory. In fact, you are DARKNESS to me." Then Satan basically starts going crazy and gnashing his teeth and Moses gets really scared. But because Moses gets scared, his faith is slipping. Then AFTER his faith slips a little he sees "the bitterness of hell." But he then calls on God, receives strength and commands Satan to leave. WOW!! This whole chapter was amazing to me. This is what I take from it:
1. God will tell us who we are, and who we are is His children. We are the children of a GOD! We have GREAT potential, beyond more than we can EVER imagine.(1 Corinthians 2:9)
2. We are after the image of GOD.
3. Thoughts that bring light and hope are from God. These thoughts will generally be uplifting, encouraging, full of hope and a desire to be the best we can be. They are also thoughts that help us feel loved by God.
4. Satan will tear us down with the idea that we are WEAK and NOTHING and FAR from God.
5. Satan's enticements and temptations will give us a DARK feeling. We will feel like a "no one" with no potential and no way to change.
6. If we begin to doubt what God has told us (WHO we are) we will lose our faith and Satan will have more power over us and we will "see the bitterness of hell."
7. No matter what BAD situation we are in, like standing face to face with Satan, if we call on God, he will give us the strength to withstand and be successful against the devil.
SOOOO AMAZING! I encourage you all to read it. So amazing.
Anyway, everything is so good. It's raining right now, of course. But we are going to have a good preparation day. A member is taking us to a "Chi Dao Bao" or "Eat Until Full" restaurant (basically, all you can eat buffet). Yes, I'm trying to eat gluten free still. It gets hard sometimes though. Like last night we went to a ward Young Single Adult FHE with an investigator and the hostess made noodles. I told her no thank you, I was allergic. She told me not to worry, and she came out with specially-made-for-me breaded french fries. Ugh. Ha, oh well. The Chinese food is still so good.
Anyway, I love you all!! Email me when you get the chance! I always love hearing from you! Thank you for letters and emails!!
Pooh Face
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